Don't Count Me Out.

Don’t count me out just yet. 

Thank God for the Red Cross

Many of you know my story, know the road I have been on the last three years in an effort to rebuild my life. It’s been putting one foot in front of the other every single day, good days and bad. I’ve been able to grow and learn so much about myself. In the process I found hope and faith and learned to trust God and the Universe to deliver me out of difficult situations and to lead me in the direction that is the vision for my life.

I have had setbacks the past few years like everyone does. But with each one I try my damnedest to get back up, brush myself off and solider on. When it comes down to it, I have no choice. I am the sole provide for a family of 4 and there isn’t time in my world for self-pity or laziness. 

I’m a fighter, a survivor. It’s what I know. It’s what I do.

However, this is a particularly scary time for me and my children. As I write this, I sit in a little dive roadside motel, that in all honesty I could not be more grateful for. I don’t mind its smell of cigarette smoke; it’s dried-out and broken pool outside the front door. It’s bad location or general rift-raft. No I’m grateful like never before that myself and my children are safe, and that they are sleeping soundly. Never before has the term “grateful for a roof over my head” meant so much.  I’m forever indebted to the American Red Cross for providing us this refuge for the next few days as we try to decide what our next move can be.

Three fire engines responded

Yesterday the in-home sprinkler system went off in my daughter’s room, instantly flooding all three levels of the home that we currently rent. By the time the fire department showed up with two engines and about a dozen firefighters, the damage was done. There was standing water on the 2^nd floor (main living area), water pouring through any available outlet in the ceiling like an open faucet. Three inches of water covered the kitchen floor, three drains poured on our couch and dining room table, and slowly the destruction made its way to the bottom level (garage) where it settled.

Trying to turn off the sprinkler

I looked around the house, firefighters in every room, and just put my hands to my face and cried. When the Red Cross disaster relief workers came, and offered hugs I cried harder. When they offered stuffed animals for the kids, a room to stay in and a debit card, tears streamed down my face.  

The damage is severe. Crew’s came almost immediately to begin gutting the house on each level. The timeline is unknown if we can return home, if at all. Certainly not for the foreseeable future.

This in its own right is unsettling enough for my children who ask about 1,000 questions a second about what will happen next. But as many of you might know I was suddenly and without reason let go of my job three weeks ago, and have been searching for its replacement since.

So as I sit here knowing what the reality of our situation is at this moment…. I can’t help but believe that something better will come along and that after all the work I have done to rebuild my life that I’m not back where I started in less than three short weeks. 

I refuse to accept this as defeat.

I refuse to give up.

I will not lie down or throw in the towel.

I won’t let fear destroy me.

I won’t let my children fear.

I will teach them that in life, disasters happen. 
Sometimes life gets scary. 
Sometimes mama doesn't have all the answers. Doesn't know what to do.
But we still have faith. 
We can still believe everything will be alright.

Life can kick you in the teeth on a regular basis but when it does are you going to go toothless??? Umm NO that’s not a good look! Find dentures till you can get implants! Fake it till you make it. Start over if you have to. It sucks. There is no denying that this sucks ass right now. But there are so many people around the world in SOOOO much worse situations than mine that it makes me feel stupid to even be afraid at this moment. But when it comes down to it we are all human and each of us has our mountain to climb big or small, so all I can do is put on hiking boots, barrow a backpack and start climbing.

I’m so grateful to each of you for the support and love you have shown me the past few months, it has without question given me more hope; inspiration, and determination then I could have ever given you.  I love you all, thank you from the bottom of my heart.  And stay tuned…cuz this is NOT over, not by a long shot!!! We are just getting started. I want you along for this ride no matter how ugly it gets, because I want you to see first hand that even still, magic can happen and anything is possible.

Other posts from living in the hotel:
Show Up
Good News Everything Happens for a Reason
Have Faith
Give me Bikram Yoga!

Standing water three stories down in a mater of minutes

Almost immediately the house was torn apart to try and prevent additional water damage

All of our stuff on the decks, soaking wet

By the next morning, this was our house. Unlivable. 

Mira sitting on the bed her and I share in the Red Cross hotel

Our new home.

HAPPY ENDING...!!!  Read about the documentary film we are making for the Red Cross National Ad campaign 





Click here to read the updates and see the videos or click on the "Red Cross" topic label to read all related stories.

Written by Sarah Centrella for Thoughts.Stories.Life. 
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