One of Those Days

     I’m not perfect by a MILLION miles. I’m flawed to the core. Like, no joke! But I mean well. I have a good heart and I try harder than anyone I know has tried for me. I fight hard. But it doesn’t mean that every day is a perfect day. 

     Tonight I looked around the table and I saw happiness and love. I saw mates and matches. I saw 2 people who look both figuratively and literally like they have been cut from the same cloth. I think to myself what a beautiful thing that is. I think of the stories I could tell when I had my “cut from the same cloth half”. But those stories are not relevant anymore, or even comical. They are irrelevant. I sit solo.
      I feel naked without my kidos round me they shelter me from these awkward moments.  I realize that I fall apart when they are not with me. Caring for someone else is what I know it’s what is natural and normal for me, and when that’s gone I’m naked (and not in a good way!).

     I leave the party with hugs, love and smiles. Get into my car, crank Adel and cry. Idk why. Really I don’t (other than I’m PMS-ing). But I do. I think, for all the love and good will I try to put out there why does the night end with him there and me here, and me sitting at a table with everyone cut from lining and me cut from wool? When can I be linen too?

Letters From Readers: Self-esteem

*This is an email chain from a question received from Tammy.  It is used with her permission, in hopes it will resonate with you as well.

Sarah... I am from Jamaica, I happened to stumble across your blog and I'm reading it till 3 a.m. :)

I was bullied in high school... It got extremely bad and since then I have become a shadow of what I used to be... I am 19 years old but so full of anger and hatred that it consumes me and I am turning into a horrible person. I used to believe in the law of attraction and I have manifested many academic achievements in my life, but I have found it so hard to use it for changing my mindset and trying t heal from all this bullying... I have so much of self-loathe and I can't even look in the mirror without cringing... I thought once I had left school (out of the bullying environment) all my insecurities would vanish and I'd be able t start fresh...

Letters From Readers. Cancer.

*This email chain is exact, and used with Sue's permission. I felt it was an important one to share in it's entirety as it's dealing with a very sensitive subject, Health. I hope that it's helpful for any of you going through similar situations.

Dear Sarah,

     I love reading your blog and find it an inspiration.

I discovered the Law of Attraction through reading The Secret, I know it works but could do with some extra help at the moment.

     Our 17 year old son has just been diagnosed with testicular cancer and will start chemotherapy soon.

     Even though the cure rate is over 98% I am struggling with staying positive and worry that all the sadness around us at present will affect other areas of our life in a negative way.

I would appreciate any thoughts you may have on staying positive and do you think you can transfer thoughts of healing to other people as my son doesn't believe in The Secret.

Thank you for your time, wishing you health and happiness.

Best Wishes,

Sue

Letters From Readers. Vision Board

From Brian:
"I just wanted to say hello, and thank you again for your blog... I posted a comment awhile back on it.  Not having a functioning printer at the time when I found your blog.... I decided to draw my vision board.  So far, so good!  I have had a large amount of the board come to fruition already. In fact, I think it's time to draw a new one.  I'm no artist, but to me I like the drawing it out, as the board seems to be more a piece of me.


I hope you are doing well. I know that it must be rough for you with the loss of your job and starting a new one. I truly admire your "chin up" attitude in the face of adversity and heartbreak. Your story is inspirational. I look forward to seeing your story progress! ".

~Posted by: Sarah Centrella for Thoughts.Stories.Life
*This is an interactive blog please leave your comments and thoughts, I will respond :)

How To Love

Love is a funny thing. We all believe we have the capacity to love, and indeed we do, but do we really know HOW to love. 

   
I was listening to a new song by Little Wayne “How to Love” and started paying attention to the lyrics, and was taken aback by the concept that for many, probably the majority of human beings really don’t know how to love. Maybe they have never been unconditionally loved, by their parents, family, pets or anyone else for that matter. 

   
If you’ve never had unconditional love do you know how to give it?

The Dating Game

So here’s the thing. I HATE dating. I mean it’s been a whole 2 years of my life that I’ve been at this game, and I can say honestly, and with deep conviction that I’m so OVER it!

    
It's weird because I was with my ex-husband from age 16 to 33 so I never had the opportunity to date, and never thought I would, or cared to for that matter. So the past 2 years have been an interesting ride that’s for sure. 

    
I don’t know what dating at any other age or stage of life would be like, say your late teens or 20’s, I never dated then. My guess is it would be less complicated. At those ages you are still figuring out who you are, so you are willing to put up with your mate doing the same.

    
Besides you really don’t know what you want so all you ultimately care about is, are they HOT?? A few other factors might apply like a main mutual common interest, but honestly it’s all about bang-ability and chemistry in those tender years of the love search. Hence when you find