Books! Books! Books!

The last five months my head has been so deep inside my memoir, that every spare second was dedicated to striking while the writing iron was hot. I'd had such a hard time transitioning from blog, or short story writing to the format of a book that it took me almost a year to get the feel, and rhythm going. Then when it started coming together, it just fell out of me.  Like an over-stuffed-pinata, hit by a sugar crazed mob of six-year-old's.

It was an emotionally draining process. I had to dig so deep for much of it. As luck would have it, fresh heartbreak proved to be an excellent motivator and source of inspiration in digging up the past. That's not to say it's all dark and twisted, it's definitely not. But to get it as real and raw as possible I had to dig deep and spend many a night crying my effing eyes out.

My book mark.... Big dreams baby! Big dreams.

Six Weeks to a Better Me.

I've noticed the past few years that as my birthday approaches I become more and more apprehensive. Growing up, birthdays where never a big deal. We didn't celebrate them.  I looked forward to them like anyone does but was always disappointed when they arrived, because it was a day like all the rest. I've still never really celebrated them, even as an adult. Never was one of those people who got all their friends together to have a big dinner and go out, or go on a trip.  I guess in a way it seemed selfish to try and do that, it would feel awkward getting people together for me.

36, no make-up.

But the last two or three years I've begun getting anxious about them for a different reason... aging. It's starting to freak me out. I mean, I never had a single wrinkle before last year. My eyes weren't fuzzy. My body bounced back after missing the gym for a while. I was flexible with, or without yoga. I didn't have age spots! But now; my back hurts, my eyes hurt, my skin needs more than once a day moisturizer. It's all bad.

Project Relentless Pursuit #2

Update on my quest to get my first book published...

~Written by: Sarah Centrella for Thoughts.Stories.Life *This is an interactive blog please leave your comments and thoughts, I will respond :)

What's Your Word?

Chose a word. 

One word, and carry it with you like a shield through the rest of your life. 

Strap it on like armor. 

Let it defend your thoughts and, in itself be strong enough to ward off darkness. 

What is your word?

Mine is BELIEVE.  For me this word is powerful enough to replace the bad with good in my life. To replace doubt and hopelessness with faith and light.

What is your word?

Believe.

~Written by: Sarah Centrella for Thoughts.Stories.Life.
*This is an interactive blog please leave your comments and thoughts, I will respond :)

Tomorrow Is Not Promised.

Life is such a fragile precious gift. It's something we take for granted every day. It's so easy to assume that tomorrow is our right and not a privilege.  But the reality is that it's a gift and it can be taken in a flash. It should be cherished, not just in the moments that bring us happiness but the ones which also break us. Because all of them are a gift. All are better than the alternative.

A few days ago my father who is a slim "healthy" 56, had a sudden heart attack. He's been a vegetarian since he was 19 years old, and a vegan for many years. He's never smoked and doesn't drink. He works in a physically active job outside and has always been the picture of heath. We are fortunate that he was given good medical care quickly, stints placed in his heart and looks to be making a full recovery. But it goes to show that you can do all the right things, and still have life come kick you in the ass out of the blue. Every day is a blessing. Don't take tomorrow for granted.


~Written by: Sarah Centrella for Thoughts.Stories.Life.
 *This is an interactive blog please leave your comments and thoughts, I will respond :)

Broken.

~
I feel broken. 

I know how to be stronger than the sorrow, but I don't care. 

Not tonight.

I need to stop my heart from bleeding out... 

But I don't want to. 

I'm afraid that when it stops, it will no longer work at all. 

And which is worse?

 ~

Listen to this song..."Your Not Alone"

~Written by: Sarah Centrella for Thoughts.Stories.Life.

The Relentless Pursuit Project

The last two years have been such a crazy ride for me. It's been hard to keep up with all the changes I've gone through. But with every obstacle my relentless pursuit has remained steadfast and stronger than ever.

Eye on the prize. Tunnel Vision

I've had a very clear vision in my mind of what I want to accomplish long term, one I've not shared with many people. It always scares me just a little every time I put into words what my little brain has been marinatin. But I also believe those words help to turn my marinade into reality, so I'll choke down the fear pill again, and put it out there.

When I was at the early stages of starting over, I looked around and it felt like there was no one like me. None of my friends or family had gone through anything like what I was facing. No one I knew was in a similar desperate financial state. I looked for hope in things like The Secret movie but felt more frustrated because there was definitely no one like me there either. The rich and famous were already that way. Everyone but me seemed to have it all together. Seemed to have arrived. I felt like an even bigger failure. So I withdrew into my own little world with my kids and hatched a plan to make my dreams a reality. Then slowly I started sharing pieces of that here on my blog.

Dreams Can Come True...

Put you goals out there. I've had this plan with me from the start

So today is a big day for me... It's one I've worked towards and visualized for a long time. As you've probably gathered I've been working on writing my memoir (also titled Thoughts.Stories.Life.) for the past 18 months, and last six months solid. It's been a goal of mine for a very long time but last year I started in earnest putting the story together and going through the process of this grand dream. I finished the rough draft a few weeks ago but it was still so bare and simple. So the last month has been a very intense process of rewriting adding details late into the night, every night.

So I apologize that I haven't written a post in a week or so I've just been so focused on getting this book FINISHED. Knowing that it's very close to ready I began sending out "query letters" to prospective agents about two weeks ago. For those of you unfamiliar with publishing (as I was before I spent the last year researching it) the first step to traditional publishing is to get a Literary Agent to represent your book to the publishing houses.